recently i was hanging with a friend’s young boys and playing our traditional game of “monster.” of course, they got to be the good guys and i was assigned the role of the enemy and “bad guy.” their ultimate goal was to get this awful coon-skinned hat off my head, so i would lose my powers and die. they also had an idea of an easier route – shooting me with a toy and immediately ending the battle. when they voiced this idea, i responded quickly with, “if you do that the game will be over and we can’t play anymore. you will have won and the fight will be over.” (i said it like that was a bad thing for them.)
no sooner did those words come out of my mouth that i saw that my very statement was such a reflection of how i often live my life in defeat. there are some “fights” and battles in my life that could be over if i would just wholeheartedly lay them down at the feet of Jesus. instead, i chose just to lay down enough when it gets too painful, but something in me still allows the fight to continue.
maybe it is:
- fear of giving the fight all over to God’s control
- pride and me thinking i know a better way
- unbelief in that God can do what He says He can do
- spiritual laziness in tackling the tough “stuff”
- choosing not to bring each thought captive
- an undisciplined walk
whatever my excuse (sin), i choose to allow the fight to continue instead of dying to those things at the foot of the cross.
as i wrap up and begin a new year in a dedicated time of self-examination, confession, and repentance, i see so clearly how there are some “battles” in my life that need to be put to death through my willing obedience to give them completely over to Jesus. what about you? are you deliberately or even unconsciously holding on to some fights knowing that Jesus is holding out freedom to you? let’s give Jesus the gift of total abandonment this Christmas and begin a new year totally surrendered to Him and soaring in the freedom only He can deliver.
Can’t even tell you how much this post spoke to my heart. It was like you had been reading my prayer journal.
This past year has been quite the journey with “obey” being the word He kept speaking to me. Sometimes I was able to do that with ease and other times it was a struggle. Those times that were easier to obey were that way because I had turned it over to Him and the struggle was due to me trying to get my hands into it thinking I could just “help things along.” (HA!) I have learned so much this past year and have grown so much closer in my relationship with Him. I have a feeling that He isn’t done with me in this area yet as He has begun to whisper “surrender” to me for the coming year. When I look back at where He has taken me in the last year, I am so looking forward to the journey in front of me.
So thankful that He has placed you in my life to share the journey friend.
Love you bunches.
love your heart wendy! my word has been faith. oh how i love hebrews 11, but how i desire to truly walk in it. because, without faith it is impossible to please God. i know He has much in store for us both this year… may we fully surrender and press into Him.
love having you in my life!